Pretentious? Moi?

Hong Kong property developers love to give their properties pretentious and silly names. Take Grand Central Plaza in Shatin, for instance - it's not Grand (unless Ikea has moved considerably upmarket in the few weeks since my last visit), and not Central. As for the Plaza part, the original Spanish word denotes a public open space like a town square, but in American (ab)usage, adopted in Hong Kong, has come to indicate a shopping mall. Oh well, a half out of three ain't bad.

Then there's Luard on the Park, a serviced apartment block in Wanchai. The "park" referred to is Southorn Playground, but I suppose Luard on the Patch of Scruffy Tarmac Surrounded by a Few Tatty Trees doesn't have quite the same ring to it.

However, for real pretentiousness, you only have to look to the world of showbiz - a headline on the BBC news website a couple of days ago reported Jude Law calls for world ceasefire. I don't want to disparage any attempts to advance the cause of world peace, but would that be Jude Law the respected international statesman? or Jude Law the Hollywood actor who hit the scandal pages for his affair with his children's nanny?

Do they even know it's wrong?

Many long term residents of Hong Kong have remarked on the deteriorating standard of English in the territory that likes to proclaim itself "Asia's world city". Wellcome supermarket continues to display posters in some of its branches exhorting customers to "Use less plastic bags". Good idea, but as someone pointed out several years ago, shouldn't there be a companion campaign educating the public to "Use fewer water"?

Then there is this sign:



Only one thing wrong with this: you don't prosecute a vehicle, you prosecute the driver. Do we have anyone left in the government who knows the difference?

Acts of Government or God

While many disasters can be blamed on the Hong Kong government, it's a bit much for Stanley residents to claim, as today's Morning Post reports, that "the government is entirely to blame" for the tragic death of a 19-year-old girl crushed by a falling branch from a tree in the village. The fact is that every year around the world, thousands of people are killed or injured by falling trees. These incidents are known as natural disasters, or in insurance terminology, "Acts of God" (or whichever imaginary supreme being you choose to blame for the universe)..

While the government is right to recheck other old trees, and will no doubt review its inspection techniques, which appear to have missed some warning signs in this case, falling trees are a natural event. If we cast around looking for someone to blame for every Act of God, we will end up like the USA, where people's first reaction is to look for someone to sue whenever anything bad happens to them.

I also fear that this accident will lead to demands from the more ignorant sectors of the population for the removal of any tree that might possibly fall on anyone at some future time, leaving our city even more a desolate mass of concrete than it is already.

The man who invented R&B

The great record producer Jerry Wexler, the man who coined the term "rhythm and blues" to replace the old "race records" epithet, has died aged 91. There's a nice tribute here at The B-Side blog..

I have a copy of Dusty in Memphis signed by Wexler. Ironically Dusty Springfield was so paralysed with nerves in Memphis that only the backing tracks were recorded with the ever-reliable studio crew there; Jerry had to coax the vocals out of her during a number of follow-up sessions in New York. This painful process eventually brought forth one of the finest of the many great albums that bear Jerry's name as producer.

Wexler was a man of many talents: a successful businessman, except for his one great mistake of selling out Atlantic Records to Warner Brothers, which he came to regret; and a songwriter whose name appeared as co-composer of some of the records he produced. But his real genius - like that of Geroge Martin with the Beatles, an ocean away - was in getting the best out of srtists, and never more so than with Aretha Franklin. Aretha's earlier and later recordings show occasional flashes of brilliance, but her reputation as the Queen of Soul rests solidly on the string of magnificent masterpieces she turned out at Atlantic under Wexler's direction.

In the last few years many of the greats of the music business have passed away: Ahmet Ertegun, who founded Atlantic Records; Ruth Brown, who fought him for years for unpaid royalties, while always respecting his musical taste; Bo Diddley just a couple of weeks ago; Wilsonn Pickett; ... the list goes on and on. Now there's another bright star in rock-n-roll heaven - R.I.P., Jerry.
Disclaimer - I get a small commission from Amazon if you buy the CD through the link here. This is the version with additional songs; there's another one with the mono versions of the singles from the albums. Both are great.

The Thieving Magpie

Well, I found the identity of my sodturner - just a few minutes ago, I caught a big fat magpie in the act (though I wasn't quick enough to get a photo). Puzzle solved - now, how do I stop him doing it?

Sods' Law for the birds

We recently had our garden returfed, as the grass had degenerated into 90% weeds. Just as last time we did this, within the next few days we found on several occasions that the local birds had succeeded in turning over some of the the squares of turf, presumably to get at the bugs or other tasty morsels beneath them.

I don't know which bird is doing this, but as each piece is about one foot square, it must take quite a bit of strength. Does anyone know if this is common behaviour for birds? And which species might be responsible?

Outrageous Arrogance and Surprising Intelligence

There seems to be no limit to the arrogance, insensitivity and sheer inhumanity of the Bush regime. Having destroyed Iraq at enormous human and financial cost (see the right sidebar), they are now complaining that the Iraqis should be the ones paying to repair the damage. Bloody cheek!

Meanwhile, Paris Hilton, of all people, has done a good job of making John McCain look ridiculous, after he compared Barack Obama to her as a lightweight celebrity in a campaign ad. I have long suspected that behind that fluffy party girl image, the Hilton genes have given Paris a sharp entrepreneurial brain; her response to McCain confirms that she also has a lively sense of humour.

A Few Post-Typhoon Suggestions

To the Hong Kong Observatory
I know weather forecasting is an imprecise science, but could you try not to sound so confident that no higher signals will be raised next time we're on number 3?

To TVB and ATV
When we wake up and find there's a number 8 signal, the only thing we really want to know is how long we can go back to bed for. If you must give us all the other boring stuff about cancelled ferries, fallen trees and scaffolding, and calling the airlines before going to the airport, could you just scroll along the bottom of the screen how long the signal is expected to be up for?

To the Hong Kong Government
Aren't you ashamed that your system for allocating Form 6 secondary places is so inefficient that students and their parents are willing to risk their lives staying out queuing in a Number 8 Typhoon to secure one of the last few precious places? It doesn't work that way for university places.

And why aren't there enough places in the schools for every student who meets the qualifying standard anyway? Don't tell me you're short of money when you're just about to spend billions on the Hu Jintao's Ego Memorial Bridge to Macau without even asking the taxpayers whether they want it.

Back to Bad Habits

A few weeks ago I praised China's exemplary response to the Sichuan earthquake. I suppose it was too good to last.

Learning from Failure

"I know how to win wars"

--Republican Presidential candidate John McCain

For some reason, devout Republicans in the US seem to think that because of his military experience, their man McBush can be trusted to do a better job of defending the nation than Democratic rival Barack Obama. I am not at all sure why - how does fighting on the losing side in a war in which you spent five years as a PoW qualify you to win wars? However heroic McCain may have been during this ordeal (and unlike those in his party who smeared John Kerry's record during the last election, no one questions that), the key issue here is not courage, but political wisdom.

In the same speech, McBush came out with another classic line:

"Understand this: When I am commander -in-chief, there will be nowhere the terrorists can run, and nowhere they can hide."

Except, presumably, the Iraq-Pakistan border that exists only in his imagination.


OK, let's pass that one over as a slip of the tongue. What, you may ask, about McCain's years of service on the Senate Armed Services Committee?

Er, would that be the same Committee that endorsed the war on Iraq on the basis of "intelligence" reports supplied by a gung-ho President eager to flex his testicles? Reports that Barack Obama, I, and probably you as well, had no diffiulty recognising as lies, as indeed they proved to be? Reports that a credulous John McCain apparently swallowed whole?

Need I say more?

All for the love of - a new telephone?

And another thing that puzzles me: why are people willing to spend several days of their precious life queuing to be the first to get their hands on the new iPhone? It's only a phone, albeit one with some nice gadgets. Why don't they just wait a few weeks till they can get it without having to waste time lining up?

There are a number of things I would be willing to queue overnight for, but not a mere tech toy. For example:

• Democracy in Burma
• A cure for cancer
• An end to genocide in Darfur
• A free trip to Mars
• A workable Middle East peace settlement
• A private dinner with Nelson Mandela and Desmond Tutu
• The closure of the US torture camp at Guantanamo Bay
  

And last but not least:

• Tickets to see Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band live in Hong Kong (are you reading this, Bruce?)

A light in the darkness

Something that puzzles me: in police dramas on television, whenever the cops enter a dark building, especially the basement, they always walk in flashing their torches (flashlights for American readers) around in the darkness. Why don't they just switch the light on?

Nowhere to go but down (with a little government assistance)

Apart from the odd RTHK offering, Hong Kong television seldom serves up any real investigative journalism. So all the more credit to ATV for their Inside Story programme on Tuesday night. I've often poked fun at ATV for their mistakes, but this was worthwhile viewing.

As you may have read, the ever so caring Hong Kong government is planning, without consulting taxpayers (many of whom have already made substantial personal donations), to spend HK$10 billion of our money to aid those made homeless by the recent earthquake in Sichuan. Meanwhile back home, ATV's programme revealed that the same caring government is waging an undeclared war; not on homelessness, which would be creditable, but on Hong Kong's homeless.

Hong Kong has never had a coherent policy towards the homeless. In the past, it has been common for the Social Welfare Department to hand out blankets to them during cold spells, only for another arm of the government to steal their bedding and dispose of it as rubbish the following day in order to tidy up the streets.

Now as if those who have already fallen off the bottom rung of the economic ladder didn't have enough problems already, in recent weeks the government has been making a concerted effort to drive them out of their traditional refuges, even though their presence there is not illegal. A playground in Mongkok that previously accommodated 50 street sleepers is now locked at night and patrolled by security guards. Spaces under flyovers are being fenced off or otherwise made uninhabitable, and their former occupants are being told to, in effect, go away and disappear.

Presumably this is all in the name of improving Hong Kong's image before the expected hordes of Olympic visitors start turning up in a couple of weeks, but a true "World City" would try to solve the problems of these people, not just sweep them out of sight like so much human litter. That would take money - for more social workers, affordable housing for the poor, better mental health care and more effective substance abuse treatment programmes - all of which Hong Kong could afford if it wanted to. That's if the government didn't prefer to spend our money on follies like the Donald Tsang's Ego Memorial Complex on the Tamar site, and the Central Bypass Shopping Mall.

But even before that, it would require seeing street sleepers as individual human beings of value with their own individual difficulties, not as an amorphous mass of garbage to be swept under the carpet. ATV's programme (which will be repeated at 12:30 tomorrow, Saturday 12 July, if you missed it) gave them a voice, but is anyone in government listening?

See Also: Homeless II - Photo Exhibition of Street-sleepers

Making It Better:
Street Sleepers Action Committee Limited

.

Where can I get me some of them there juicy worms?

The current TV propaganda for the Olympic equestrian events in Hong Kong proudly informs us that 60 million earthworms are at work keeping the venue green. I'd like to get hold of some of those.

No, seriously, no kidding. After weeks of heavy rain, my little patch of garden in Taipo is a horrible mass of compacted heavy clay, where I've never seen a single worm since moving in five years ago. I reckon a few thousand earthworms would make a big improvement to the soil, but where do I find them? I don't suppose digging up the Olympic venue would make me very popular, but if the government can get hold of 60 million of the critters, there must be somewhere here that sells them. Anyone know where?

Nokia No use

I'm no Luddite, but I sometimes doubt whether mobile phones are entirely a good thing. For one thing, there are the inconsiderate jerks who yak away on them in cinemas and other unsuitable venues. (I was greatly embarrassed recently when mine rang while I was sitting in the public gallery of a magistrate's court, although I thought I'd tuned it off.)

Then there is the invasion of privacy: one used to get home and be asked "Where the hell have you been?" Now you can be called up at any time and asked "Where the hell are you?" And of course they give telemarketers another channel for bothering people.

All of which is by way of introduction to the fact that the Nokia phone I've been happily using for the past few years was becoming harder and harder to switch on and off. Finally I decided the switch had had its day, and took the phone into the Nokia service centre in Causeway Bay. There they took one look at it and instantly declared it too old to fix - "no spare parts". Of course they suggested I trade it in on a newer model.

Hmmm - why would I want to buy a brand that breaks down and can't be fixed? Maybe I should try a Sony Ericsson instead - after all, I've got a Sony TV that's still working fine after 15 years or so.

But really I don't want a new phone at all, just for this one (for which I only recently bought a new battery) to carry on working. I'm not a gadget freak who salivates over the next generation iPhone or whatever. My eyesight is crap, so i don't text muxh and I need a decent sized screen. Most of the newer phones have keyboards too small for my large fingers. I have a PC for Internet access, an MP3 player for listening to music, and a digital camera for taking photos, so I don't need those features in my phone - am I the last person in Hong Kong who just wants to use his phone for voice calls?

Given the number of old phones being discarded, is there any third-party repair service that can cannibalise another phone for the part I need? Or do I just have to resign myself to buying a new one? And how do I choose from the thousands on the market?

One more thing: if I need to buy a new phone, how do I dispose of the old one in an environmentally responsible way? And how many old (but often still functional) phones end up in landfills rather than being recycled?

Get out and don't come back

The abrupt closure of the Tatami Hampton Hotel this week is another blow to Hong Kong's already sagging reputation as a tourist destination. Whatever the legal wrangles over the hotel's ownership, when a private residence changes hands the residents cannot be evicted at a moment's notice. Yet apparently under Hong Kong law it is perfectly legal to toss forty hotel guests, many of whom will have paid for their accommodation in advance and may have little spare money with them, out into the street without warning or compensation. This is simply wrong, and the government and Tourism Board need to work together to ensure that it cannot happen again.

4 - 1 = H5N1

It's not only ATV News's English that is suspect; their mathematics may need a brush-up as well. On tonight's 7:30 news they translated a Chinese farmer's words as, "Sales went down by a quarter. I sold only 100 ducks when I usually sell 400."

That is not going down by a quarter, that is going down to a quarter. If his sales went down by a quarter, he would be selling 300. It's just as well his sales didn't fall by 90%, or ATV would have had an opportunity to misuse the word "decimate" - though in fairness, most of the population of Britain gets that one wrong too.

So if ATV is so bad, why don't I watch TVB news instead? Mainly because I find them too parochial - TVB usually leads on a domestic story and has less adequate coverage of major international events.

Thanks from all the fish

Do my ears deceive me, or did Belinda Lloyd really say on ATV news last night that floods in southern China had made many houses inhabitable?

Does ATV employ any competent writers or editors? Do the reporters actually think about what they are saying? Does anyone care except me?

And now for something completely different (from reality)

A couple of weeks ago, when it became known that leaked Hong Kong police records had appeared online, the first reaction of Police Commissioner whatshisname was to appear on the TV news claiming that police computers are secure. Immediately after him, Security Secretary Ambrose Lee appeared to reassure the public that government computers are secure.

So, that's all right then.

In other recent Hong Kong Government announcements:
> Sharon Stone to be guest of honour at Olympic Games.
> Falun Gong to be Hong Kong's official religion.
> Monty Python's parrot "not dead".

Most pretentious job title of the week

PARKnSHOP is advertising for a Replenishment Assistant - or as it used to be known, a stock checker.

Among my possessions

The publishers of HK magazine are advertising for a new editor for their other publication, The List. Among the stated requirements is this:

"The applicant should possess a university graduate".

I didn't know slavery was still legal in Hong Kong - but at least our slaves are well educated.

But wouldn't it be more comfortable horizontally?

The text on this paper towel dispenser in Guangzhou's Baiyun International Airport suggests that China's programme to improve the English on signs in Beijing for the forthcoming Olympics has not been extended to other provinces.

Incidentally, why do all new airport terminals look as if they were designed by Norman Foster? (or perhaps they are all designed by Norman Foster?)

Advertisement for Myself

Unlike the near-confessional detail of some blogs, I generally keep my personal life out of this one, but today I will make an exception; the fact is, I am looking for work. I have no idea who reads this apart from a small number of friends and family, but maybe it will reach someone appropriate, who knows?

If you, or someone you know, is looking for help with copywriting, editing or proofreading of English language documents of any sort - reports, proposals, corporate profiles, correspondence, website text, press releases, advertising and promotional materials, speeches and presentations, procedure manuals, etc. - I can probably help, whether it's a single page or a major project.

In addition to 15 years experience of providing corporate communications services for many clients, including numerous well known brands and leading companies, I also have extensive experience in business process improvement. I began my career in systems development, moved into IT systems quality management, then broadened my scope to quality management in the wider world.

I have been involved in projects as varied as ISO 9001 and 14001 compliance; Business Process Reengineering; the development of strategic plans and business plans; creation of mission and vision statements; Balanced Scorecard preparation; conducting job evaluations; compiling competency profiles; developing training plans and curricula; job evaluation and preparing job descriptions; and the odd bit of teaching thrown in.

I am also a published writer (not just here!) who has had about 40 articles appear in magazines.

If any of this sounds useful, please get in touch (serious enquiries only, please). You can leave a comment here to contact me - as the blog is moderated, I will receive it but it won't be published online. And by the way, I also have a bunch of qualifications ranging from an MBA degree to an advanced certificate in food hygiene, despite which I won't charge you an arm and a leg!

Dead People Day

I have quite a few things I want to write about, but no time to do so. But I did just want to mention the passing of Bo Diddley at age 79 - of the six towering figures who shaped early rock'n'roll, he is probably the one who earned least recognition (and money), despite his songs being recorded (or ripped off) by everyone and his dog. Now he's joined Elvis and Buddy Holly in rock'n'roll heaven. 54 years after it all started, we should be thankful we still have Chuck Berry, Fats Domino and Little Richard around.

And today is of course June the 4th. Take a few moments to remember, because after 19 years, there are many people in positions of power who would prefer you to forget.

Open Letter to a Hollywood Heartthrob

"I'm not happy about the way the Chinese are treating the Tibetans because I don't think anyone should be unkind to anyone else. And then this earthquake and all this stuff happened, and then I thought, is that karma? When you're not nice that the bad things happen to you?"

--Sharon Stone

Dear Ms Stone,

I am sure you mean well, and I'm not happy about China's treatment of Tibet either, but are you aware of the following facts:

• > The mountainous western part of Sichuan, where the earthquake struck, was historically part of Tibet before China annexed it.
• > Many, perhaps the majority, of the people in this region are ethnic Tibetans.
• > China is not a democracy.

So are you saying that Tibetans are being karmically punished for the way a government they did not choose and have no control over treats their ountry? And is it "kind" to tell five million people who have lost their homes, their possessions, their jobs and in many cases their children that it's their own fault for having the misfortune to live in a dictatorship?

How do you apply your theory to the events in Burma? Already suffering the karmic burden of having to live in a country controlled by a corrupt clique of crooks, many of them are now suffering a double dose of bad karma from the recent destructive cyclone.

Furthermore, if people's misfortune can be seen as a karmic payback for the evil done by their government, how do you view 9/11? After all, a succesion of elected American governments has done a lot of questionable things in various countries around the world.

In fact, do you even know what you are saying? Or should you do a little more research and analysis and thinking things through before making political statements in future?

Regards,
Private Beach

Getting a bit above ourselves, aren't we?

ATV's English news on Thursday night seemed to have scored an exclusive scoop, with its bold statements that "Premier Wen tells ATV ..." this and "Premier Wen told us..." that. That is, until you saw the accompanying visuals: yes, dear, you and the fifty reporters from other media outlets who were also present. Don't get over-excited, OK?

Leeches and Vampires

I received my first fake Burma cyclone relief email yesterday, headed RECOVERY FUND NOTIFICATION, and purporting to be an appeal for the Burma cyclone victims - it doesn't take these leeches and vampires long before they scent blood to suck.

The usual email scams are bad enough, but taking advantage of disasters to divert well-intentioned help away from people who have lost everything already is unspeakably sick. I hope these scammers rot in hell where they belong.

If you want to help in Burma (or China), make sure the help really gets to those who need it. World Vision, for example, has aid workers on the ground in both countries getting help to the needy.

Making It Better:
World Vision Hong Kong

...but would Beijing like it, Donald?

"Give me a child until he is seven and I will give you the man."

--attributed to Saint Francis Xavier, founder of the Jesuits

Did you notice that Donald Tsang couldn't resist crossing himself during the three-minute silence for China's earthquake victims yesterday? Once a good Catholic boy, always a good Catholic boy.

Hong Kong's Multifarious Musea

How many museums do you reckon Hong Kong has? Ten? Twenty?

Try closer to fifty, many of them little known even to locals. The best known are probably those managed by the Leisure and Cultural Services Department, but others are run by other government departments, public bodies, educational institutions and private organisations.

Here is a list:

1. Aberdeen Country Park Visitor Centre
2. Airport Core Programme Exhibition Centre
3. Art Museum, The Chinese University of Hong Kong
4. Dr Sun Yat-sen Museum
5. Fanling Environmental Resource Centre
6. Fireboat Alexander Grantham Exhibition Gallery
7. Flagstaff House Museum of Teaware
8. Health Education Exhibition and Resources Centre
9. HKMA (Hong Kong Monetary Authority) Information Centre
10. Hong Kong Correctional Services Museum
11. Hong Kong Film Archive
12. Hong Kong Heritage Discovery Centre
13. Hong Kong Heritage Museum
14. Hong Kong Housing Authority Exhibition Centre
15. Hong Kong Immigration Museum
16. Hong Kong Maritime Museum
17. Hong Kong Museum of Art
18. Hong Kong Museum of Coastal Defence
19. Hong Kong Museum of History
20. Hong Kong Museum of Medical Sciences
21. Hong Kong Planning and Infrastructure Exhibition Gallery
22. Hong Kong Police Museum
23. Hong Kong Public Records Building
24. Hong Kong Racing Museum
25. Hong Kong Railway Museum
26. Hong Kong Science Museum
27. Hong Kong Space Museum
28. Hong Kong Visual Arts Centre
29. Hong Kong Wetland Park
30. Lantau Link Visitors Centre
31. Law Uk Folk Museum
32. Lei Cheng Uk Han Tomb Museum
33. Lions Nature Education Center
34. Madame Tussaud’s
35. Museum of Ethnology
36. Ping Shan Tang Clan Gallery
37. Plover Cove Country Park Visitor Centre
38. Po Leung Kuk Museum
39. Sai Kung Country Park Visitor Centre
40. Sam Tung Uk Museum
41. Sheung Yiu Folk Museum
42. Shing Mun Country Park Visitor Centre
43. Tai Mo Shan Country Park Visitor Centre
44. Tao Heung Foods of Mankind Museum
45. Tsuen Wan Environmental Resource Centre
46. Tung Wah Group of Hospitals Museum
47. University Museum and Art Gallery, The University of Hong Kong
48. Urban Renewal Authority's Information Centre
49. Wan Chai Environmental Resource Centre

There may be more, depending on how you define "museum". For example, many of the buildings declared as ancient monumnets by the government are open to the public, though not formally classified as museums. And many other places have museum-like collections of memorabilia, such as the Hard Rock Cafe's display of rock artefacts.

Please add a comment if you know of any I've missed.

Bluntly Awful Songs

I think I may be going mad. This morning I heard a song on the radio, thought, "that sounds nice,", then found it was by James Blunt. Only I don't like James Blunt - I thought his massive hit "You're byoo-dee-farl" was horrible, at least in part because someone smart enough to graduate from my old university should at least have learned how to pronounce "beautiful" properly.

I am not alone in this dislike: readers of The Sun in Britain voted the song the most irritating of all time. I am happy to say I have not heard most of the others in their Top 10 (an unintended benefit of living well out of the western cultural mainstream in Hong Kong), though The Macarena certainly deserves its place on the list (and Shout doesn't).

Several of the same songs turn up on Rolling Stone's Top 20 list, while another poll provides a few more to avoid, as does this one, while a BBC viewer suggests that football songs are the most annoying. Another BBC respondent there suggests that the whole Cantopop genre should be condemned, which seems a bit harsh even to those who have had the misfortune to hear Twins attempting to sing....

My own list probably betrays my age: I would certainly include the following:
> Copacabana by Barry Manilow
> Chirpy Chirpy Cheep Cheep by Middle of the Road
> Mickey by Toni Basil
and of course anything by Michael Bolton, whose voice I find intolerable.

Ultimately what such lists prove is that there's no accounting for taste: I actually enjoy a few of the songs listed - Tub Thumper, for example - while even the worst of them (My Humps, anyone?) sold millions, so someone somewhere must like them. Which doesn't make them bearable - after all, millions of people voted for George W. Bush.

IQ Test for Americans

Email received this morning:

INTERNAL REVENUE SERVICE
United States Department of the Treasury
Over 130 million Americans will receive refunds as part of The White House program to jumpstart the economy. Our records indicate that you are qualified to receive the 2008 Economic Stimulus Refund.
The fastest and easiest way to receive your refund is by direct deposit to your checking/savings account. Please follow the link and fill out the form and submit before May 17th, 2008 to ensure that your refund will be processed as soon as possible.

etc., etc. Since I'm neither an American citizen nor a US taxpayer (who would want to be, considering the USA is one of only two countries in the world to tax its citizens on their worldwde income, even if they're non-resident?), it was easy for me to recognise this as an obvious phishing scam. But I wonder how many US taxpayers, eager to get their refund quickly, will fall for it and hand over their bank account details to a complete stranger?

The Race for the White House (geddit?)

Quote of the Day:

"Hillary Clinton ended Tuesday night with a big victory in West Virginia, showing once again that old, white, poor, uneducated people really don't like young, witty, urbane, well-educated black men. Quelle surprise."

--Chip Collis, How Obama WON Tuesday, in The Huffington Post (also known as Huffpost), the essential blog for anyone interested in American politics.

Another Huffpost quote today:

"7% of the voters in West Virginia voted for John Edwards. Faced with a black man and a white woman, these voters chose a white man who isn't running. And these are Democrats."

--RJ Eskow, Even The Racists Are Deserting Hillary. Eskow goes on to say, "The 'black candidate is unelectable' discussion is one Democrats usually hold in private. In public they're supposed to say :'If you won't vote for my opponent because of his race, I don't want your vote.' (Wink, wink.) Hillary broke that rule..." "To succeed in politics, you have to deal with ugly facts sometimes. Here's one ugly fact: Some voters won't vote for a black man. Here's another: Some of the same voters won't vote for a woman. It's foolish to think you can advance the rights of one group by inflaming prejudices against another. The best way to fight racism or sexism is to fight all prejudice."

The irony here is that Edwards, the "white man who isn't running", endorsed Obama, the black man who is, after the primary. Bye bye, Hillary.

Meanwhile, following up yesterday's post, two news snippets from the BBC:
"Nearly 15,000 people died and 25,000 are still trapped in the earthquake that hit China, official media say."
"The UN sharply increases to 2.5m its estimate of those severely affected by Cyclone Nargis in Burma."

Another BBC report on the dire conditions in Burma here. And a quote from another BBC report yesterday:

"In the former capital Rangoon, itself badly damaged by the cyclone, one man summed up the frustrations of a nation. 'When we had demonstrations last year the soldiers were everywhere,' he said. 'Where are they now?'"

A Tale of Two Disasters: Compare and Contrast

I've been critical of China often enough in this blog - most recently only yesterday - so it's only fair that I should give the Chinese government credit when they get something right. There could hardly be a greater contrast than that between the handling of two natural disasters: the Sichuan earthquake and the Burmese cyclone.

Within hours of Monday's deadly earthquake in Sichuan Province, which has killed at least 12,000 people so far and left possibly hundreds of thousands homeless, the Chinese government had rushed rescue teams into the area, and 50,000 troops are hard at work locating survivors and clearing blocked roads to enable supplies to reach the area. Prime Minister Wen Jiabao was quickly on the scene to demonstrate the central government's concern and assess the situation for himself. China has also welcomed offers of assistance from overseas, and journalists are apparently free to visit and report on the earthquake zone.

"We must treasure every second and do our utmost to save survivors," Wen is quoted as saying - not a message that appears to have reached Burma, where the callous clique of bandits in uniform that runs the country is still hindering relief efforts, almost two weeks after Cyclone Nargis swept over coastal communities, killing more than 34,000 people according to the latest official figures (probably grossly understated).

Although as many as 1.5 million people now face homelessmess and the threat of disease and starvation, the Burmese regime continues to deny visas to international aid experts and to confiscate relief supplies arriving in the former capital Rangoon (Yangon) - reportedly either diverting them or relabelling them to appear to be from the Burmese military. The long standing ban on foreign reporters (who might tell the truth about conditions in the country) is also still firmly in place, with the government seemingly committing more resources to enforcing it than to solving the problems reported on.

Some aid is trickling through, but so inadequate and tardy has been the official response to the disaster that even the mormally impeccably doiplomatic United Nations Secretary General Ban Ki Moon, rarely directly critical of UN member governments, has described it as "unacceptably slow".

Meanwhile Burma's military rulers, whose greed, corruption and mismanagement have achieved the rare feat - rivalled by Robert Mugabe in Zimbabwe - of transforming a country rich in natural resources from one of the wealthiest in its continent to among the world's poorest, remain holed up in paranoid seclusion in their isolated slave-labour-built new capital Naypyidaw, at the opposite end of the country from the storm-struck Irrawaddy Delta, showing no signs of any genuine concern for the plight of their people.

So, is this a case of "China good, Burma bad"? Well, not quite - real life is seldom that black and white. The murderous Burmese junta's main trading partner, and strongest overseas backer, is China...

P.S. Immediately after posting this, I turned to Spike's blog to find him saying something very similar, with the added thought that the US Government's response to Hurricane Katrina in 2005 more closely resembled Burma's than China's - lest we forget.

Making It Better:
China donations - Oxfam Hong Kong
Burma donations - Hong Kong Red Cross

Interesting Reading

"If file sharing is destroying the music industry, then how did Warner Music Group increase its sales in the first quarter 7 per cent to $989 million?"

From the latest issue of (Bruce Springsteen biographer) Dave Marsh's periodic email newsletter Rock & Rap Confidential (just linking those two genres is already an unorthodox move). Sign up for it here.

"The severity of Chinese repression in Tibet since [1959] is well-documented. There is severe repression of Tibetan Buddhism, which in 1997 was labeled as a “foreign culture” Virtually all classes in secondary and higher education in Tibet are taught in Chinese not Tibetan, resulting in a high drop-out rate among Tibetans. Urban development has generally benefited Chinese immigrants, large numbers of whom have moved to Tibet and who are now about 12% of the population in the Tibet Administrative Region. Tibetans are routinely detained for long periods without charge or sentenced to long prison sentences for peacefully advocating independence or maintaining links with the Dalai Lama. Torture and ill-treatment in detention is widespread. Freedom of expression is severely restricted. Peaceful political demonstrations are invariably broken up and their participants arrested. Tibetan culture is treated as inferior to Chinese culture, and most key posts in the government and the economy are held by Chinese. Those few Tibetans who are able to enter Chinese government service do so at the cost of alienation from their own people and culture. Tibet’s environment and natural resources are ruthlessly exploited in the interests of China."

Hong Kong's Law Society commissioned Senior Counsel Paul Harris, an expert in constitutional law, to write an article examining the legal basis of the case for Tibetan independence, then chickened out of publishing it. Fortunately maverick publisher (and well known campaigner for the rights of minority shareholders) David Webb displayed more testicular fortitude - you can read the whole article on his site.

How Global Is That?

You may not have noticed that yesterday was the Global Day of Prayer, with prayer gatherings in many countries, including one at the Hong Kong Stadium.

Strangely, for an event that claims to be global, only the world's 2.1 billion Christians appear to have been invited to the party. Missing from the invitation list were 1.5 billion Muslims, 900 million Hindus, 376 million Buddhists, 23 million Sikhs, 14 million Jews, 7 million Baha'is, 4.2 million Jains, 4 million Shintoists, 2.6 million Parsees, 600 thousand Rastafarians, and hundreds of millions of other faiths (figures from this site). Now, if you could only get all that lot praying together, you might even get me to join in.

Just horsing about

Headline from today's South China Morning Post:

"The government said yesterday it would not welcome anyone who "seeks to damage the solemnity" of the Olympic Games in Hong Kong."

Solemnity? Excuse me? We're talking about a bunch of people riding horses around here, not a funeral ceremony.

If the epithet fits, wear it

"Patriotism is the last refuge of a scoundrel."
--Dr Samuel Johnson

News reports of Friday's Olympic torch relay in Hong Kong stated that some peaceful protesters were physically threatened by elements of the pro-Beijing rentacrowd supporting the relay. "Goons and thugs", anyone?

In Macau's torch relay on Saturday, the ratio of athletes to Beijing toadies (19 out of 120) was even lower than in Hong Kong.

This site has some interesting points to make about the whole kerfuffle:

* The Olympic torch relay is not an ancient Greek tradition, but originated as a publicity stunt for Nazi Germany in 1936.

At that time, Germany's ally Japan was preparing for its bloody invasion of China, which resulted in millions of Chinese deaths. Today the 1936 Games are mainly remembered for two things: Leni Riefenstahl's magnificently crafted propaganda films, and black American sprinter Jesse Owens making a nonsense of Hitler's theories of white racial superiority.

* The Chinese translation of “Olympic flame” has misinterpreted it as “Olympic sacred flame”.

This is psychologically significant because it makes any protest against the torch relay not a political act, but an act of sacrilege. So an atheist regime has God on its side ...

Running Out of Ideas

It seems appropriate that it should be raining on the day of Hong Kong's Olympic torch relay, which is kicking off as I write. Leaving aside the issue of human rights in China, public interest in the event has already been severely dampened by the yawn-inspiring selection of 120 runners chosen to carry the torch.

While no one would dispute the right of first and last runners Lee Lai-Shan and Wong Kam-Po to participate, some of the others between them are odd choices indeed. Sports people get less than half the slots, with past medal winners for Hong Kong in the Asian Games and (before 1997) Commonwealth Games being left out in favour of an ill-assorted bunch of clapped-out pop singers (apparently representing "culture", the other half of HK Olympic boss Timothy Fok's LegCo constituency), big company bosses and never-clapped-in politicians. It's rumoured that even the Donald wanted to take part, but his advisers warned him (correctly) that this would be seen as one ego-trip too far.

Imagine you have trained your butt off to do your best for Hong Kong in your chosen sport, then find the Olympic torch being carried instead by the likes of grumpy old man Tsang Hin-Chi, whose only known exercise routine is to open his mouth to say "Yes" to Beijing and chide as unpatriotic those who disagree with him.

The reason given for selecting all these non-sporting figures is apparently to "represent the various sectors of the community". Apart from the glaring omission of major sections of the public (any trade union leaders? any democrats?), if the government really wanted to involve the community, they would have staged the relay yesterday when the community was on holiday and people could come out to show their support, not today when they're all back at work.

"Bah, humbug!" is the only appropriate response to this whole mismanaged event.

The Way You Do the Things You Do

Immediately following the horrific train accident in China a couple of days ago, Chinese authorities immediately dismissed two senior officials of the railway, then announced that an inquiry would be held to determine the cause of the crash.

Wouldn't it make more sense to hold the inquiry first to determine who was at fault before taking action against anyone? And if they already have a scapegoat to carry the can, why do they need an inquiry?

Meanwhile, following today's disastrous bus crash which saw (at last count) 18 people on their way to church here in Hong Kong come face to face with God sooner than they expected, transport officials insisted the road is safe because they've put up plenty of warning signs telling motorists not to exceed the speed limit. Yeah, knowing Hong Kong drivers, that would really stop them speeding ...

Made in China

You may think this is exaggerated, but as so often in life, reality outstrips fiction: the BBC reports that Tibetan flags used by anti-Olympic protesters may have been made in China.

Most Olympic protests have focused on Tibet, but the South Korean leg of the torch relay highlighted another stain on China's grubby human rights record - the forcible return of thousands of refugees who have fled repression and starvation in North Korea to a regime which is known to imprison and even execute them on their return.

Suffer Little Children

"What does it mean to speak of child protection", asked Pope Benedict on his recent US visit, "when pornography and violence can be viewed in so many homes through media widely available today?"

It means that millions of people worldwide, unlike an alarmingly high percentage of Catholic priests, are able to enjoy erotica without being inspired to sexually abuse young children. The Church is supposed to aspire to higher standards, not blame its failings on society's temptations.

Stealing from the slightly richer to give to the poor

Trailer on TV for a coming current affairs programme (maybe the Pearl Report, but I wasn't really paying that much attention; this is from memory):

"Hong Kong's health system is breaking down under the pressures of an aging population and the rising cost of new medical technology. Who will pay to reform it, if not the middle classes?"

Er, the rich?

Uh-oh, what am I saying, forget I said that, don't even think about it.
This is Hong Kong.

China: a free country?

Other bloggers such as Spike have already criticised the Standard's absurd piece by one Mary Ma attacking plans for protests against the Hong Kong leg of the Olympic torch relay. Leaving aside the missing apostrophes throughout, starting with the heading, (which could be blamed on the paper being unable to afford a competent sub-editor), what does Ms Ma have to say?

In an article that could have (and possibly did) come straight out of the Chinese government's propaganda machine, Ms Ma come up with some classic lines:

"The Hong Kong Alliance in Support of Patriotic Democratic Movements of China ... is selfishly promoting its cause at the expense of an event treasured by everyone."

How selfish to put the rights of a billion people ahead of those of a few hundred people running and tossing balls around!

"Has anyone in the alliance stopped to consider other peoples [she really doesn't like apostrophes much, does she?] right to being treated with dignity?"

Like giving people sentenced to death the dignity of a fair trial first? Or giving 22 million people in Taiwan the dignity of being allowed to choose their own future without having missiles pointed at them by bullies who claim to be their own kin? Or giving Tibetan monks the dignity of being allowed to carry pictures of their respected religious leader without being arrested? Or giving journalists the dignity of being able to perform their job (as guaranteed by the Chinese constitution) without government interference or arrest? Or,going back a bit, giving unarmed protesters in 1989 the dignity of being able to demonstrate peacefully without being brutally attacked and killed by their own country's troops?

Yet perhaps it is too easy to snipe at China's numerous blatant human rights abuses (and no, I am not pretending that the West is perfect by comparison, as my past comments here on other matters show). Despite all this, the fact is that the majority of Chinese people today enjoy greater freedom than at any time in their country's history. China, after all, emerged from feudalism as recently as 1911, only to go through decades of warlordism, foreign invasion, civil war and Maoist dictatorship, culminating in the madness of the Cultural Revolution.

At the dawn of the 1980s, Chinese people had few choices in anything - perhaps they could choose to wear identical outfits in either grey or blue. They could not choose what to buy - there was almost nothing in the shops anyway. They could not even choose to marry without permission from their work unit (which they also did not choose).

Deng's Open Door policy changed all that. Today Chinese people are free to choose their own job, start a business, decide what to wear, what and where to study, travel or study overseas, marry whom and when they choose. They can make money and decide how to spend it. They can build or buy their own home. While not everyone has yet benefited from the changes, it is easy to forget how much things have been transformed in China in a single generation.

Chinese people still do not enjoy many of the freedoms taken for granted elsewhere: the right to plan their family; to practice their religion freely; free access to information. Yet there has truly been a quiet revolution in China over the past thirty years. The problem is how to ensure that this process continues on the right path. China saw hosting the Olympics as part of that path to modernity; facing criticism and protest also comes with the territory.

Living on the edge

As well as the UK, my recent trip took me to Prague for several days. Prague is amazing - simply one of the world's most beautiful cities anywhere. Many cities have attractive old centres, from Stockholm to Nara (and not forgetting our near neighbour Macau), but nowhere else have I seen such a massive concentration of beautifully preserved historic buildings over so large an area. Every corner you turn brings you to another architectural gem, some Gothic but most baroque in style.


The city has a lot more to offer visitors than just great architecture: numerous classical concerts every day; an array of museums varying from the xublime (Mozart Museum) to the ridiculous (Museum of Sex Machines), from the educational (Museum of Communism) to the disgusting (Museum of Mediaeval Torture Devices); some good restaurants; and of course, some of the world's finest beer, from the people who invented pilsner.

One thing I found interesting was that, being British, I had grown up during the Cold War thinking of everything east of the former Iron Curtain as "Eastern Europe", and therefore out of the mainstream of European life. The Czechs, however, do not view themselves as East Europeans at all, but as living in Middle Europe, at the very heart of European civilisation - which, both geographically and historically, they are:



Now, apart from being an interesting study in varying perceptions, what significance does this have to us here in Hong Kong? Only that, while we see ourselves as being in a pivotal position within the dynamic Asia Pacific Region, from the perspective of Beijing, far to the north, we probably appear to be way out on the southern fringes, and therefore relatively unimportant in the greater scheme of things.

I'm Dreaming of a White Easter

No posts recently as I've been on a trip to the UK. It should be the beginning of spring there, but I woke up on Easter Day to this:


As spring approaches, a reminder to English girls: midriff-baring fashions and a beer belly are not a good combination.
P.S. If you think I'm exaggerating, read this. (Thanks, Fumier.)

For Queen and Country

Proving that Gordon Brown is as much in love with superficial gestures as his predecessor, the latest daft idea to come out of Britain's New Labour image factory is for teenagers to swear an oath of allegiance to Queen and country. While citizens of more conformist nations such as the USA may enjoy such exercises, I have always regarded it as one of the great benefits of being British that one is free to decide one's own allegiances, including total opposition to the monarchy if one so wishes.

If the British government really wants Britons to be proud of their country, they could start by taking their collective head out of George W. Bush's backside and standing up for traditional British decency against the Bush regime's illegal wars and use of torture and kidnapping.

Don't forget to tune in for tomorrow's exciting episode...

Whenever there is a firework show in Hong Kong, which seems to be about three times a year these days, both local Chinese channels carry it live. No complaints about that - not everyone can get out to see it in person - but why the hell do they need to have several halfwit local presenters sitting there adding an inane unnecessary commentary? Especially as the show is already coordinated with a selection of music which makes a perfectly acceptable soundtrack by itself.

What is there to say about a firework show anyway? Oh look, there'a red one! Now a green one! Now a big bunch of sparkly whirly things! Just shut up and give our ears a rest!

I've had a go at ATV's professionaliusm recently, so it's TVB's turn today. On one of their innumerable Chinese period costume drama series last week, one episode ended with a man picking up a rock and standing over another man lying asleep, evidently with the intention of dropping the rock on him to crush his skull. Cut to credits...

Now the cliffhanger ending is a staple device of drama, from the old cowboy Saturday movie serials to Doctor Who. The idea obviously is to get the audience intrigued enough that they will tune in next time to see what happens to the character left facing imminent doom.

Well, that's the idea everywhere except Hong Kong. So what do TVB do next? Immediately follow up with a trailer for the following episode. An opportunity to ratchet up the drama level further? Well, no - they show the would-be killer changing his mind, dropping the rock on the ground and walking away. So, no need to watch that episode then. Idiots!

Post-Primary Plurality

I caught a brief excerpt on TV yesterday of Hillary Clinton speaking after her apparent comeback in the latest Democratic party primaries (though closer examination of the statistics shows that she has very little chance of beating Barack Obama to the party momination). In it, she said, "...at the end of the day we're going to be the nominee."

I'm puzzled by her use of the plural here. Is that a royal we, I wonder, from one who sometimes appears to see herself as the anointed future Queen of America? Or a "Bill and I" we? Or a "me and my team" we?

The Huffington Post points to a survey showing that either Clinton or Obama could beat John McBush (I call McCain that because he wants to perpetuate many of Bush's mistakes, especially the tragic and illegal war in Iraq), but by winning a different set of states. However, they don't examine the scenario of a joint Obama/Clinton ticket, which cannot be ruled out. After all, as this BBC headline from 27 February - "Democratic candidates Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton attack each other's campaign tactics in their latest debate" - suggests, their differences are more over style (and conflicting egos) than policies.

Hello My Bai Ling

Another South China Morning Post headline:

Actress Bai Ling fined for disturbing peace
12:15pm Actress Bai Ling, arrested last month on suspicion of shoplifting at Los Angeles International Airport, was fined US$200 (HK$1,557) on Wednesday after pleading guilty to disturbing the peace.

AP has the story here.

I am puzzled by the media's regular use of the word "actress" to describe Bai Ling. Has anyone ever actually seen her act in anything, except a provocative manner designed to draw attention to herself?

What took you so long?

That's the only possible response to this news in today's South China Morning Post:

"Timely rethink on urban renewal strategy
The Urban Renewal Authority is considering giving residents a say in the fate of their old neighbourhoods, rather than dictating a redevelopment plan to them."

One can only hope they apply this to existing projects, not just to future ones, before every last remnant of this city's soul is eradicated.

All the world's a stage...

After a decade of so-called "reality television", it seems it's no longer possible to tell where the real world ends and showbiz begins. Excite.com has this story listed under "Entertainment News".

Incidentally, how sweet of sleazeball Matt Drudge to expose Prince Harry's presence in Afghanistan, thereby making him a Taliban target. What a nice guy.

Joined Up Government, or does the right hand know what the left hand is doing?

Two recent stories from the South China Morning Post website:

• 23 February - "Hotel sites likely to be on offer in next land-sale list
  The former home for juveniles in Kowloon Tong and new hotel sites in North Point and Hung Hom were expected to be available on the upcoming land-sale list, government and property industry sources said."
• 1 March - "Hotel development given priority on land sales list
  Hotel sites will be offered at lower trigger prices than commercial sites in the government's new land application list as a means of encouraging hotel development, the government said yesterday."

Perhaps I'm missing something, but if Hong Kong is so short of hotel rooms, how come we keep seeing perfectly serviceable existing hotels redeveloped for other purposes? Does it make any sense that the system allows the Furama, Hyatt Regency, Ritz Carlton etc. to be decommissioned when there is apparently such a hotel shortage that the government has to give incentives to encourage the building of more? Or am I being too logical?

Budget Blow-out

John Tsang's first budget as Hong Kong's new Financial Secretary appears to have something for everyone, though it does nothing to solve the longer term structural problem of financing pensions and health care for an aging population.

Many young people arrived from the Mainland in the 1950s and 60s and worked hard to lay the foundations of the prosperity Hong Kong enjoys today. Times were hard in those days, and many earned only enough to provide for their immediate needs, with no opportunity to lay something aside for the future.

As Hong Kong became a major economic force, most of its people were lifted out of poverty. But lower income earners were hard hit by the migration of Hong Kong manufacturing to the Mainland in the 1980s. Those with limited education and few skills were stuck in low paying jobs, if they could find work at all. As this age group becomes too old to work, those without supportive relatives face a precarious old age, and will inceasingly rely on government support to survive. What was once a youthful population has changed owing to low birth rates and the world's highest life expectancy.

Meanwhile, one feature of the budget that will benefit me personally is the removal of duty on beer and wine, both of which I enjoy. But in its eagerness to promote Hong Kong as a centre for wine trading in Asia, I wonder if the government has considered the possible consequences of making booze more affordable to young people? Anyone who has seen how some urban areas in Britain are taken over by packs of drunken yobboes at weekends, leaving a trail of vomit and broken glass, will not want to see the binge-drinking youth culture spread to Hong Kong (nor the obesity to which it contributes).

Memo to ATV News: the government does not "give away" money to taxpayers. The correct term is "give back" - it is our money in the first place.

English is a funny language

Just thinking:

• If people from Burma are Burmese, why aren't people from Rome Romese? And people from India Indiese?
• If Javanese come from Java, why don't Japanese come from Japa?
• If Finns come from Finland, why don't Ires come from Ireland? And Ices from Iceland?

Crazy language, huh?

P.S. Does anyone know why bullet points appear correctly in a preview of Blogger posts, but not in the final post?

Save Water, Waste Paper

I received my water bill last night. And my water bill. Both the fresh water and flushing water bills, each mailed in a separate envelope, enclosed two A4 size circulars - one in Chinese (I don't know what it's about, but it didn't look important so I put it out for recycling) and one containing the Water Supplies Department's performance pledges for 2007/2008. On the front of the latter in large letters were the words:

"Save Water for the Future
Every Drop Counts"

I have a suggestion for the Water Supplies Department (a branch of the Hong Kong Government):

"Save Trees
Every Sheet of Paper Counts"

Not to mention:

"Save Taxpayers' Money
Every Cent Counts"

Even electricity company CLP, hardly a model of environmental rectitude (in fact one of Hong Kong's biggest polluters) offers electronic billing as an alternative to paper. The WSD plans to introduce this in stages, but only starting in 2009. Meanwhile it is sending out 7.2 million water bills a year on paper (complete with unwanted and unnecessarily duplicated enclosures).

So, here are some suggested performance pledges for 2008/2009 for the Water Department

1. Send out each year's performance pledges to customers during that year, not almost a year later. In 2008 we should be reading about your 2007 achievements, not those of 2006.
2. Combine fresh and flush water billing to save paper.
3. If this is not possible, at least send the two bills out in the same envelope to save on paper and postage.
4. Speed up the introduction of electronic billing as an alternative to paper billing.

Making It Better:

Water Aid

Whose Heritage?

"Who funds the Heritage Foundation?" asks Fumier, in response to an earlier post here. A good question, so I set out to find out. Some of the answers are here and here.

According to Wikipedia, the influential Foundation was set up with funding from Joseph Coors of the Coors brewing family. Today it states that its funding comes from "the financial contributions of the gemeral public: individuals, foundations and corporations," and that it accepts no government funds. While corporations apparently account for less than 10% of its total funding of around US$30 million a year, they appear to have a strong influence on its pro-big business policies. Donors include many of the usual suspects: Chase Manhattan Bank, Dow Chemical Company, Ford Motor Company, General Motors, Microsoft, Procter & Gamble, Johnson & Johnson, GlaxoSmithKline, Pfizer, Boeing, Lockheed Martin, American International Group (AIG), Novartis, ChevronTexaco and Exxon Mobil. Some money comes from overseas, including Korean sources and the Margaret Thatcher Foundation in Britain.

Tobacco money is naturally represented among this crowd, with Altria Group among the donors (known as Philip Morris until their reputation for killing their customers forced them to change their name); in exchange for their support, they are rewarded with such egregious pieces of propaganda as this. Notice two ingenious arguments here: tobacco tax should not be increased because "with the number of smokers already declining, a tobacco tax would further reduce the number of smokers, thereby eroding the funding source" (isn't reducing the number of smokers a key objective of such increases?); and "young adults are ... disproportionately impacted by the tobacco tax"(doesn't the tobacco industry always say that it wishes to discourage young people from smoking?)

According to Wikipedia, the Heritage Foundation is associated with the Hong Kong consulting firm Belle Haven Consultants, which lobbies in Washington on behalf of Malaysian interests.

Would you buy a used policy from these guys?

Creedence Clearwater Retitle

According to a DJ on one of RTHK's Chinese radio channels, the song Proud Mary was written and performed by John Forgetty. Funny I don't remember that.

Then there was the ATV newsreader who announced recently that Herbie Hancock had won a Grammy for River: the Johnny Letters. Er - that would be Johnny Mitchell, the well known male singer?

Another classic from ATV news last night: "Lydia Shum was born in Shanghai in 1945 and got her first big break in 1960 at the tender age of 13". As our transatlantic cousins like to say, you do the math.

Do these presenters consider themselves professionals, I wonder?

I Can See Clearly Now

"I got new eyes
Everything looks far away"
--Bob Dylan, Highlands

Just in case anyone is wondering why I haven't posted here for weeks, I've been recovering from eye surgery. Thanks to Dr Cheung and the team at St Paul's Hospital Eye Centre, especially the nurse who asked me if I can speak Cantonese, then laughingly replied "siu siu" for me before I could say it myself.

I've posted occasional comments on other blogs, but nothing here as I was limiting my time online to avoid eyestrain. Meanwhile, lots of blogworthy things seem to have happened in the past few weeks, and I'll catch up with some of them soon. Keep watching!

Ghost Destinations

Every day, hundreds of minibuses on Hong Kong Island travel to a destination that doesn't exist. For years, red minibuses terminated at the Daimaru department store in Great George Street, Causeway Bay (the terminus is now in nearby Sugar Street). The store closed in 1998, but a decade later, the minibuses still advertise it as their destination. Locals know where they mean, but it must confuse the hell out of tourists (maybe that's the intention...).

Meanwhile up in Taipo, green minibus passengers still request to be let off at "Kah Si Bah", though the Carlsberg Brewery in the Taipo Industrial Estate closed in 1999, and the local market is now supplied from Carlsberg's mainland breweries.

Does anyone know of any other ghost destinations in Hong Kong that linger on in this way?

Spam, Spam, Spam, Stupidity and Spam

Message in a Yahoo group I belong to (dated 17 January) promoting "replica" (i.e. fake) watches and the like:

"We sure, that you are looking for Christmas gifts.

Hurry up! The best gifts and huge price break only in our Christmas store!"

Well, doesn't everyone do their Christmas shopping in January?

Two sides to every freedom

For the 14th year running, Hong Kong has been named the world's freest economy, ahead of Singapore in second place. This title is bestowed by the Heritage Foundation, a right-wing US-based organisation.

The Foundation warns, however, that Singapore is closing the gap. But before we all panic that Hong Kong is no longer competitive, let's look at some of the Foundation's criticisms and translate them into plain English:

• The Scheme of Control regulation of electricity prices (translation - let the two power monopolies rip off consumers with uncontrolled prices)
• The regulation of prices for public transport (translation - let transport operators rip off consumers with uncontrolled prices)
• The regulation of some residential rents (translation - let Hong Kong's greedy landlords charge the SAR's poorest people, mostly elderly, even more for tiny cages in rat-infested pre-war slums)
• "Restrictive" pharmaceuticals regulation (translation - forget about protecting the consumer from dodgy fake drugs)
• Market access restrictions for legal services (don't know about that one)
• Limited import licensing (to the best of my knowledge, Hong Kong has fewer import restrictions than almost anywhere in the world, and most of those that do exist are intended to ensure food safety)
• Issues involving intellectual property rights that add to the cost of trade (not sure what they mean by this one)

Here's a question: if Hong Kong's economy is so free, how come we only have two big supermarket chains?

When big business calls for deregulation, what they really mean is usually dismantling worker protection, dismantling environmental protection, and dismantling consumer protection so they can enlarge their already bloated profits. Do we really want to be more "free" in this sense?

As for comparisons with Singapore, the Heritage Foundation says nothing about political freedoms. Even without democracy, we are streets ahead of the Lion City in terms of freedom of expression.

The rise of the machines

Am I the only one who, on seeing people walking around with Bluetooth mobile phone headsets seemingly permanently attached to their ears, is irresistibly reminded of the Borg in the later Star Trek series?

How far will man/machine hybrids go? We already have thousands of people walking around with artificial pacemakers and plastic hip joints. That's fine, but now there are proposals to insert a computer chip into convicted criminals (as we already do to dogs). And you would have to be very naive indeed to think that governments will be content with only chipping criminals - all in the interest of preserving our freedom by destroying it, of course. Welcome to 1984.

Sound familiar?

I was watching an old episode of "Cheers" last night in which Frasier Crane persuades likable but slow-witted bartender Woody to run for the City Council for a bet. Briefing Woody before a debate with his opponent, Frasier concludes his advice with, "... if that doesn't work, just say the word 'change' about a hundred times".

Now, does that remind you of anyone?

Blinding us with(out) science

The Times of London (once a highly respected paper of record, but nowadays owned by Rupert Murdoch) discloses that controversial billionaire George Soros, an opponent of the Iraq War, partially funded the 2006 study that estimated the number of deaths attributable to the war as 650,000. The accuracy of this figure was fiercely criticised at the time, and a more recent study puts the number of dead at "only" 151,000 (still 151,000 too many).

The Times article quotes Michael Spagat, economics professor at Royal Holloway, University of London, as saying "The authors should have disclosed the [Soros] donation and for many people that would have been a disqualifying factor in terms of publishing the research". This only shows that "many people", including Spagat, are stupid.

The source of funding of a scientific study, though it may warn us to be wary of a possible hidden agenda, says nothing in itself about the validity of the study's results. If the survey is conducted honestly and the methodology used makes sense, why should the fact that person A rather than person B paid for it make any difference? Apart from which, who is going to fund such studies apart from opponents of the war? The war criminals in Washington, London and Canberra who started the war have done their best to avoid and obfuscate the whole issue of the resulting death toll. Soros deserves credit for helping to bring the historical facts into the open.

Unable Seamen

Last night's crash between two Macau ferries should never have happened. Sure it was foggy, but a) those vessels carry radar; b) there are well-established rules of navigation designed to avoid collisions; and c) common sense says that if you can't see far ahead, you should slow down. Conclusion: unless the Marine Department investigation turns up something surprising, the most likely reason that 140 people were injured is either incompetence, carelessness, or both on the part of one or both crews.

That was not the only accident in local waters yesterday. Hong Kong's loony drivers are dangerous enough; it would be nice to be able to take a ferry to Macau without worrying that there may be an idiot at the helm, or steering another vessel in the vicinity.

None of the Above

The government has given the go-ahead for construction of the Donald Tsang's Ego Memorial Complex on the Tamar site, which will cost us more than HK$5 billion of our money. While the design has some interesting features, it is apparently not the one that was preferred by a majority of respondents to the public consultation exercise, which presented four options. No surprise there - when did planning in Hong Kong ever give priority to the needs and preferences of ordinary people over those of the big property developers?

There is of course a fifth option which was never offered to the public: none of the above. The use of the Tamar site was rammed through by the government despite considerable sentiment suggesting better alternative uses for it.

Since the Legislative Council will move to the new site, the question arises of how the existing Legislative Council building - originally the Supreme Court - will be used in future. Dare we hope for some real public consultation on this? Or will it be yet another decision made behind closed doors?

And if you think the Tamar project is expensive, wait till you see the cost (if they ever dare to reveal it) of the Hu Jintao's Ego Memorial Bridge to Macau.

DaDa Dali and the Surreal Swimmers

I passed a van this morning with an ad on the side for an amateur swimming club with the domain name daliswim.com.hk - now that conjures up some intriguing visions! My wife (ever practical) said it's probably just an abbreviation for "daily swim", but I prefer my version. Now, where did I put my floppy watch...

And while we're on the subject of Hong Kong websites, how come the South China Morning Post website was down for a couple of hours earlier this morning?

Nothing to my name - well, maybe a little

Interesting to see a lengthy interview (in English) with veteran Beijing rocker Cui Jian on CCTV-9 over the weekend. According to his Wikipedia entry, he is no longer blacklisted by the authorities in China; however, he did say during the interview "China has not changed" and "I will be a troublemaker forever".

Jumping to Conclusions

According to last night's ATV news, the Hospital Authority would make a full investigation into the contaminated blood transfusion received by a patient in Tuen Mum Hospital (who has subsequently died), but was satisfied that hospital staff were not to blame.

Perhaps someone should tell them that it is a good idea to conduct the inquiry first and announce the conclusions afterwards; otherwise you run the risk of coming across like the Pakistani government, which within the space of a few days announced that Benazir Bhutto had been shot; then that she had been killed by shrapnel; then that she had fractured her skull on the sunroof of her car while ducking to escape a suicide bombing; then that it didn't matter how she died, only who killed her; then suggesting that she should be dug up again to establish the cause of death for sure. Now they have apparently come back to the original gunshot theory (after two videos emerged showing men brandishing guns in the crowd around her).

The Hong Kong incident also produced an early entry in the "stupid statements of 2008" file, when a hospital spokesman was reported as saying that the bacterium concerned, Pseudomonas Fluorescen, would do little harm to a healthy person. Since blood transfusions are not generally given to healthy people, this falls into the category of totally useless information. Once can only assume the intent was to make a serious situation seem more trivial in a feeble attempt to dilute criticism for it.

Is this any way to run a business?

Quote from tonight's financial news on ATV:

"Ford is selling these units [Jaguar and Land Rover] to concentrate on its unprofitable US business."

Er.. wouldn't it make more sense to concentrate on your profitable businesses and dump the loss-making ones instead?

Meanwhile, the main news reported that Western Harbour Tunnel fees, already the highest among the three tunnels, will rise by $5 or more depending on the type of vehicle. Since many drivers already go out of their way (literally) to use the $20 Cross-Harbour Tunnel rather than the (currently) $40 Western Tunnel, this can only drive even more vehicles away from the tunnel, which has run at a loss since it opened.

Conventional economic wisdom suggests that where there are alternatives in the market, the best way to attract more business is to lower prices, not to raise them. Do the tunnel's owners know something we don't?

Hong Kong - Ignoring the Sky

Looking at a list of the world's tallest skyscrapers, I find that Hong Kong has several entries in the top 100, including a couple I've never even heard of! My lack of awareness could either indicate how much we now take skyscrapers for granted here, or reflect the fact that we don't often notice how tall our buildings are because Hong Kong's appalling pall of smog hides the upper half of them from our sight.

Another reason may be that, unlike those almost everywhere else in the world, Hong Kong's skyscrapers do not incorporate public observation platforms. In a city that seeks to attract tourists, this seems daft to me, but I suspect the reasons are driven by financial considerations like most things here. Perhaps revenue from tourist admissions can't outweigh the exorbitant rents that high floors can command.

For the record, Hong Kong's entries are:
7. IFC Two
11. Central Plaza
12. Bank of China Tower
17. The Center
27. Nina Tower I
55. Cheung Kong Centre
68. The Cullinan I
69. The Cullinan II
90. Hotel Panorama

Hong Kong therefore accounts for 9% of the world's 100 tallest buildings, with another 7 entries in the next 100. Note that the list counts twin towers as two separate entries; if you prefer to count Petronas Towers (ranked 3 and 4) as a single building, then Hong Kong has two in the top ten.

China is well represented overall, with Shanghai, Beijing, Chongqing, Wuhan, Nanning and Guangzhou all in the top 100, as well as our neighbour Shenzhen at number 9. Taipei 101 heads the list, with Shanghai's new World Financial Centre just behind. Remarkably New York's majestic Empire State Building - the first of the world's great skyscrapers, dating back to 1931 - remains in the top ten today, thanks to al-Qaeda. Not for much longer, however - Dubai is now constructing a new building expected to top the list when completed.

Height rankings vary between lists depending on how they define a building - most lists exclude communications towers such as Toronto's CN Tower, the world's tallest free-standing man-made structure (North Dakota's even taller KVLY-TV Mast is supported by cables); how they measure masts, antennae and other twiddly bits on top of the buildings - see here; and when they regard a building as completed. You can find other lists here, here and here.

The Most Dangerous Country in the World

Whatever your view of Benazir Bhutto, her murder yesterday can only further destabilize the already chaotic situation in Pakistan. Forget George Bush's obsessions, potential nuclear powers North Korea and Iran; one misstep in Pakistan now could deliver existing nuclear weapons into the hands of Islamic fundamentalists. And if that doesn't scare you, nothing will.

AMAtwilightZONe

Even if you regularly use Amazon.com to buy books and CDs, you may not be aware that you can also order a diverse array of such exotic items as an internally fully carpeted armoured vehicle with built-in stereo system (a snip at only US$20,000), a UFO detector, a can of uranium ore, a fresh whole rabbit (dead) or a vaginal speculum.

If some of these sound like self-parodies (as do other Amazon items like the book "What Would Jesus Eat?"), what makes them even more enjoyable is that many people are now posting spoof reviews of them (as I learned from BoingBoing via I'm Learning to Share!) Take for example the reader who offers the helpful hint that using uranium ore as a facial scrub will give your skin a beautiful glow...

Read these reviews and enjoy before Amazon tracks them down (possibly with the aid of the UFO detector?) and exterminates them.

Private Beach's "People of the Year" Award

Time Magazine has named Russia's president, the "steely and determined" ex-KGB officer Vladimir Putin, as its Person of the Year for "imposing stability on a nation that has rarely known it" (didn't some guy named Adolf get praised for doing the same thing in Germany back in the 1930s?)

Time is at pains to point out that its designation is a reflection of Putin's historical significance, not an endorsement of his placing "stability before freedom". Here at Private Beach we have a different approach - it is not enough to change the world, our person of the year must reflect this blog's values as well.


Private Beach's first annual "People of the Year" award this year therefore goes to the courageous monks of Burma for doing the exact opposite of Putin: putting freedom before stability, even at the cost of their own lives. Their brave nonviolent stand against one of the world's ugliest regimes - a military dictatorship that has maintained "stability" for decades through repression, murder, torture, forced labour, rape and genocide - is in the finest traditions of Gandhi and Martin Luther King, and though unsuccessful in the short term, has reawakened world awareness of their country's woes and placed Burma's rulers on the defensive. One day the country's people will be free.

[Picture by "Forest of Orchids", found on Flickr; I hope he/she doesn't mind me using it in a good cause.]

Delusion of the Week

"I go around spreading good will and talking about the importance of spreading freedom and peace".

--President George W. Bush

Reality and George have never been close friends, but now they seem to be drifting even further apart. Unless, that is, you think that illegal wars, torture, kidnapping, secret prisons and spying on your own people are conducive to good will, freedom and peace.